I was reading a blog post today that had me wandering back to my pre-teen years. They were embarrassing ones for a lot of people, but it took me awhile to remember even a sparse few stories that caused retroactive mortification. I’d like to think that maybe the reason I had to search so hard was because my adolescence was a golden one, full of witty banter (a la Gilmore Girls) and shiny young beauty. But I wore braces for a full nine (9) years, so scratch that last part. After my mind cleared and some memories resurfaced, I’ve decided that skinny little girl- and I’m trying to treat her gently, she was awfully sweet- clearly did not understand how the principles of nature and social etiquette functioned. She is not someone I would trust with my children, actually.
So here’s to the nerdiness, the naiveté, the self absorption that is the crown and the glory of the pre-teen years. I offer you some of my best, none of which I thought was odd in the least at the time.
1. My tee shirts & sweatshirts were really something. They were magnificantly huge, covering me up so completely that my knees were the first part of leg to appear. I dressed this way for years. There was no telling how big I was under those things; even an adult would have drowned in them. I don’t feel so alone in this one because all three of my siblings went through similar phases, and some of them also wore sweatpants to round out the ensemble.
2. First I need to admit that I dressed up as Helen Keller for Halloween once. Then I can move on to the fact that I was so interested in blindness that I tried to teach my five year old sister how to ride a bike blindfolded. Bandana wrapped around head blindness, not close-your-eyes-but-you-can-peek-a-little blindness. It was her first time on a bike, so, fun.
3. I snuck out of my bedroom, just to see if I could do it. I had nowhere to go. I just wandered around the yard in the dead of night and then went back inside.
4. I wanted to shave my legs pretty badly by around the sixth grade but was too embarrassed to ask my mom. I think I was certain she’s say it was too early. My brilliant solution was pantyhose. I wore NUDE PANTYHOSE to gym class. Thinking no one would notice? I did, in fact, get called out on it and I just told that little busybody I wore it because I was always cold. Duh.
What about you? Stories, please.